8 Score Young Blondes & Brunettes Seek Firm Hand
I would be remiss to run a spanking blog without reminding everyone of the lovely and enthusiastic young ladies of Castle Anthrax:
DINGO: Oh, wicked, wicked Zoot. Oh, she is a naughty person and she must pay the penalty, and here in Castle Anthrax, we have but one punishment for setting alight the grail-shaped beacon: you must tie her down on a bed and spank her.
GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking!
DINGO: You must spank her well, and after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like, and then, spank me.
AMAZING: And spank me.
STUNNER: And me.
LOVELY: And me.
DINGO: Yes. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking!
GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking! There is going to be a spanking tonight!
DINGO: And after the spanking, the oral sex.
GIRLS: The oral sex! The oral sex!
GALAHAD: Well, I could stay a bit longer….
From, of course, Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
Ass Spanking Etiquette
I found a blogger with an etiquette issue for which Miss Manners will not be providing a useful solution:
I’m left pondering one major question this weekend: What is the appropriate way to tell someone you would not like to spank her ass? I mean, how does that work? You’re dancing and a woman says to you, “Dance with me, I’ll let you spank that ass.” Isn’t the only response in that situation to spank that ass? Can you ever say, “No thank you, I’d rather not spank your ass right now?” I don’t think so. Conversely, if a woman says to me, “Come here, let me spank your ass” can you say, “No thank you, I would not like for my ass to be spanked at this juncture?”
I have that problem all the time.
Spanking The Critic
This book review of the diaries of notorious British theater critic Kenneth Tynan (who is perhaps most famous as the first person to say “Fuck” on television) reminds me of why erotic spanking is sometimes called “The English Vice”:
Smacking bottoms wasn’t just a hobby for Tynan: it was a way of life, a cause, and heavy is the hand that holds the whip (or cane, or paddle). Although some commentators still insist on treating his spanking fetish as if it were a kinky diversion, a naughty bit of English-schoolboy vice, he was engaged in far more than recreational play, as his use of the phrase ‘anally sadistic’ indicates. In the diaries, he puts on his A-list of desirable things “the propinquity of a female bottom I can quite freely whip”. Tynan’s sadism wasn’t just foreplay served with a sting, but systematic brutality against women – concentrated anger. “To cane a woman on her bare buttocks, to hurt and humiliate her, was what gave him his greatest sexual satisfaction,” Dundy writes in Life Itself! In the diaries he describes caning her for having a fling with Kingsley Amis, “one stroke for each letter of his name”, then ordering her to confess her punishment to another couple (like a dope, she did).
…
Not that he’s unwilling to put his own pale moon into play. A cosy weekend with his regular spanking partner and mistress, Nicole, becomes a slapstick fiasco after she administers a vodka enema (his bright idea), which shoots through his anal canal like Prussic acid, turning his bottom into a scalding volcano.
Vodka? What was he thinking?
Daria The Sarcastic Slavegirl
It turns out that Jollyroper is not the only one who has given some thought to the effect of slavery on Daria’s sarcasm. Here’s an excerpt from a long Daria fanfic called “Heard about Ms. Li?” in which Daria, Jane, Quinn, and the whole fashion club are captured and trained for white slavery:
Mrs. Bennett raised her flogger, causing Daria to flinch. As soon as she relaxed, Bennett gave her several hard blows on her back and buttocks.
“Stop that, dammit!” Daria screamed. “I’m getting sick and tired of this crap, and I want out!” she pleaded, as the plump woman kept whipping her naked body. Mrs. Bennett maneuvered the girl over to one of the columns and pushed her up against it, hard.
“And I’m tired of your nonstop backtalk, bitch! Stop squirming, dammit! Oh, will I be so glad to see the last of you!”
She grabbed the manacles and hauled them up to a waiting hook and slipped them over. Daria kept fighting, but the woman was much stronger and quickly had the restraints firmly attached. Stepping back, she got a large rubber ball gag from one of the many storage racks throughout the barn and jammed it into Daria’s mouth.
Daria attempted to kick her, but she stomped hard on her shackle chain and fastened that to the post. Still struggling with a burst of nervous energy, Daria threw herself against her bonds until they began to hurt her wrists and ankles. Spent, she looked dazedly at Mrs. Bennett and mustered all the venom she could in her eyes.
“Poor little girl!” Mrs. Bennett huffed, slightly winded from the struggle. “All those brains, and you still haven’t figured out resistance is futile. Mistress Li was going to give you a good working over, but she won’t mind if I warm you up a bit first!”
Mrs. Bennett stormed over to one of the racks and selected a well used riding crop and a spreader bar. With a violent shove, she forced Daria’s legs open and affixed the spreader bar to her shackles. Stepping back, she began to swat Daria’s crotch and breasts, making sure she was landing the blows directly on her new rings. Daria began to jerk and moan in pain at each blow, tears flowing down her smooth cheeks.
“Awwww, does that hurt? You poor baby! Let me take your mind off those nasty little rings, dear,” she mocked, exchanged the crop for her flogger. With slow, steady strokes, Daria began to jerk spasmodically, sobs slipping out from the large rubber ball jammed in her mouth. Diane began to get wet as she saw her helpless victim dangle before her, eyes tightly shut.
“Enough!” Li’s voice cut through the room. The Asian woman stalked up the sobbing girl, shaking her head. “And up until yesterday afternoon you thought you were well prepared for anything life had in store for you. All you ever had was that sarcastic attitude to fall back on when problems arose. Why, I’ll bet you’ve got a sarcastic remark right now! Let’s find out, shall we?”
She took the gag out of Daria’s mouth, and looked straight into her terrified eyes. “Well, Ms. Morgendorffer, I’m waiting.” Daria was still sobbing between breaths, and she shook her head vigorously. “Such a waste. Here she has the perfect opportunity to mock us, and all we hear is her going boo-hoo-hoo.”
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Humiliation & Revenge
Here’s a story chock full of erotic humiliation and revenge. Joining the story in progress, Robyn, who previously tricked Natalie into exposing all her naked charms in front of an appreciative public audience, is getting some just deserts, having been entrapped as the spankee in a public spanking booth for charity:
Robyn cringed in shame and embarrassment as the first curious, customers arrived, to be greeted by the enthusiastic Natalie.
“Roll up! Roll up! Big butt here just waiting to be spanked! Five dollars worth, sir? Certainly. Have an extra one on the house! Oh no, she won’t feel a thing. These panties are extra-specially padded. You didn’t think her butt was really that size, did you?”
Robyn squirmed, and struggled, and pleaded through her gag, but to no avail. Then she felt the first of the hand-spanks, mainly from men who were delighted to get the chance to paddle such a young, beautifully presented, pantied rear. And all for a good cause, too! Poor Robyn yelped and whined as each loud, painful spank landed on her unprotected rump, making her butt-cheeks dance and wiggle delightfully through the tight, white silk panties. Soon her rear began to redden, and throb, and she bucked and cursed, and longed to rub her throbbing behind.
…
Robyn struggled against the handcuffs, wriggling her tormented butt as she did so, trying desperately to get out of this humiliating predicament. This only made the whole spectacle more enjoyable for the on-lookers. The tent was now filled. Everyone wanted to stay on and watch the spankings after they had delivered their own.
From When The Red, Red Robyn by Shaw.
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Daria of Gor
Jollyroper has an amusing comment, and some well-captioned Photoshop fun to go along with it:
“Imagine Daria in a Gorean culture — I figure it would be about 30 seconds before she’d find herself naked and tied spread eagled with a great big gag in her mouth to stifle her sarcasm — and her screams.”
Caption: “Let’s see how ironically you can scream, Daria!”
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His Girlfriend Caned
Here’s a fanciful tale of a schoolgirl caning, as told by the schoolgirl in question to her boyfriend before she lets him soothe the marks:
“I stood patiently as Mrs. Crachet pinned up my skirt. My bottom felt painfully exposed. She tugged at my panties to make sure they fit snuggly and I had to bend across her desk. I was stretched almost to tiptoe to reach the other side, my bum thrust out behind me. ‘Fighting is a serious offense,’ she said sternly. ‘Though it’s your first time, Sherry, I’m going to give you six of the best. Don’t let go of that table or the blow won’t count and you’ll earn an extra to boot.’ I sobbed at this news, not knowing how I was going to endure this punishment.
“She touched my bum lightly with the cane to line up her stroke and then I heard the whistle and crack and felt a tremendous pressure across my buttocks. For a fraction of a second it was just pressure, no pain, but then suddenly I felt a burning as though a red-hot poker had been pressed against my rump. I cried out–I couldn’t help but want to scream–and wiggled frantically. It didn’t help but I couldn’t stop myself.
“There was another stroke, very close to the first, and though I thought it impossible, it was even worse than the first! A third came down and I thought for certain I would pass out. How could anyone endure such agony? I sobbed and moaned and wiggled, completely out of control.”
From Girlfriend by The Flogmaster.
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