Spanking Blog: Adult Erotic Spanking At Its Best

“The Boss” wrote in to share an essay he worked up from a spanking lecture. Given the close (one might even say “warm”) connection between spanking and certain D/s lifestyles, I thought some of my readers would enjoy hearing from The Boss about his personal approach to the D/s game and to his own well-spanked subbie:

Fairness and the Dom/Sub Relationship
By The Boss

The first and foremost thing one must understand about fairness
is that it is a HUMAN invention. It does not exist in nature nor,
arguably, is it even a major factor in most human cultures. Bad
things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people.
“C’est la vie” captures the spirit of this, but doesn’t go far enough.
The basic truth is LIFE is not fair.

On the other hand, dominance and submission are facts of life,
both in nature and the human world. One buck will have all the
does he wants and the vast majority will go without. The head
lion gets his “lion’s share” despite not participating in the
hunt. Lesser dogs will lay on their backs and turn up
their bellies to the alpha male when he comes around. Why is
this the case? Because it WORKS . . . without a hint of
fairness at all.

There is no denying the basic human emotion that desires for
things to work out ‘right’. Criminals SHOULD be punished,
and the virtuous SHOULD have their rewards. But the
EXPECTATION of fairness is a relatively recent development.
What we must question is whether this expectation
is reasonable or not. Or whether it may only be
reasonable in some circumstances and not others.

I would argue that fairness is neither reasonable or
even desirable in a D/s relationship. Is it ‘fair’
that one person have most or all the power? Is it
fair for a submissive to be punished for infractions
(real OR imaginary), while her dominant operates under
no such penalties? Not at all!

A healthy D/s relationship has many good qualities,
but fairness is not among them. It should be based
on trust, respect, caring and a healthy dose of
responsibility (on the part of all members). But
the essential fact is that the dominant has all
the authority. All of it. With that comes all of
the responsibility. And yet, it is the submissive
who ends up with the whipped tail and waiting on her
master, literally hand and foot at times.

The eternal cry of the freshly punished subbie is
“That’s not fair!” True, and that’s the way it should
be. The contract between a dominant and his submissive
(whether explicit or implied) is “I will care for you,
but I have the right to guide you, use you or
discipline you as I see fit.” Nowhere in there is the
responsibility to cater to anyone’s sense of fairness.
To do so would undermine the essential UNfairness
of the transfer of power inherent in all hierarchical
relationships.

Nor does a submissive, deep down, truly desire fairness.
By ceding power, she is saying, “Do not be fair to
me, CONTROL me.”

The fairness doctrine insists that people be treated
equally and identically for the same actions. If a
sub makes a mistake, she may be whipped, denied
pleasures or forced to perform some arduous task. A
dominant, making the same mistake, might simply
make a sincere apology. Should the bottom get to
swat the top in the latter case? Of course not!

A dominant should strive to be consistent,
even-handed, and authoritative. But fairness should
be avoided in all its forms. And BOTH parties will
be happier for it.

Obviously this is not your typical politically correct Bay Area negotiated playspace power exchange we are talking about. But who cares, if the players are happy?

Here’s another movie spanking, a real classic. This promo photograph is from the movie The Girl He Left Behind (1956) and shows Tab Hunter spanking Natalie Wood with his hand:

Huge grin on his face, and isn’t that a pretty smile on her face too?

I have previously linked to images from the age of slavery, as a reminder that the whip was not always a symbol of good clean pervy fun. This image is, I think, more recent, but still very much from a less enlightened era. It’s also a rare crumb for those of our fans who prefer to see robust male hineys under the lash:

From soc.sexuality.spanking, this revised version of Byron’s classic “She Walks In Beauty Like The Night“:

SHE shakes her booty, what a sight!
Her protest climbs; she stamps and cries
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meets in her ass and tearful eyes;
This mellow’d brat now so contrite

Was Heaven to spank and to chastise.

One smack the more, one stroke the less,
Had half impair’d the nameless grace
Which waves of lust and of distress
Are sweeping keenly o’er her face,

Where thoughts obscenely sweet express
How hot, how wet their dwelling-place.

And on those cheeks once white as snow
So soft, so sore, yet eloquent,
The stripes between the tints that glow,
But promise nights in passion spent,—
A mind afire with need below,
A heart that’s far from innocent.

I’ve linked before to the spanking goodness to be found over at Pink Flamingo Publications. Here’s another small excerpt from a spanking novel that’s for sale over there:

While admiring the lovely sight before them, the inspired disciplinarian delivered round after round of smacks, making Bridget’s bottom acutely raw. His aim drifted downward for a time, as he lay a potent dozen on the more tender flesh of her thighs. With this, Bridget let out an angry howl, “Oh, my god, no please!” Her voice rocked the air with a passionate plea for mercy that fell on deaf ears.

In answer to that desperate plea, at least a half dozen more strikes snapped rudely on her thighs before her tormentor changed his aim again. Bridget was only too happy to have the treatment return to her padded behind.

As the scene evolved, the paddling finally came to an end. Only after the paddle was retired for the night did the penitent woman note the fire on her ass. The warmth that spread across the surface expanded to the insides of her body, into her quivering thighs, and up her spine. She could feel the warmth reach the center of her crotch where her pussy was moist and blood pulsed in an erotic frenzy. The empty cavity clenched involuntarily, but she halted the reflex knowing what that would communicate to the men around her.

From Reckless Disregard by Lizbeth Dusseau.

See Also:

• A Neighborly Belt Spanking
• Cropping Her Thighs
• Paddled In Front Of The Class
• Explicit BDSM Views
• Paddled At The Prison Farm

It’s a hot day in July, so I’m going to go play in the sunshine. I’ll leave you with this promo still from one of the original summer movies, showing Elvis spanking Jenny Lee in Blue Hawaii:

That facial expression she’s got looks like good old fashioned outrage, so either she was a good actress, or Elvis was getting into his role, or both.

Synchronicity in action! First one email correspondent was sharing with me the fact that Spanish has a rich specialized vocabulary covering various ways to hit, beat, cut, slice, stab, and murder people. One word for hitting someone with a stick, another for hitting them with a strap, et cetera. Fascinating stuff, but then again, what do you expect from the people who brought you the words “strappado” and “bastinado”?

Then another e-mailer pointed me to Wulfram’s Spanking in Other Languages page. The page presents the word for spanking in 45 languages! As my correspondent points out, you can use these words in search engines to find spanking resources that would otherwise not likely be discovered. Very handy.