Extreme Heart Crop

Remember the Extreme Crop, which is made from a solid disk of very painful aluminum on a stainless steel rod shaft? Apparently it wasn’t romantic enough for some, because now it’s been updated in red for the hearts-and-flowers crowd as the Extreme Heart Crop:


The catalog copy reads:

For a heartfelt smack, the Extreme Red Heart Crop will deliver your message loud and clear! Made from aircraft grade aluminum, the red anodized heart tip will treat deserving derrieres with a love tap from as slight to as severe as you want. A stainless steel rod connects the heart to its equally strong aircraft grade aluminum handle, ensuring swift swings won’t cause any accidental snapping or breaking.

This 22 inches of metal is the very definition of tough love: cute enough for a Valentine’s Day treat, strong enough to last for years.

When you bring out this beauty and start smacking bottom cheeks with it, you just know your hopeless romanticism will be deeply appreciated!

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