Of course! It keeps everyone happy in my family. A woman’s body is designed to be spanked regulary. It should always be done out of love or fun not as abuse. I crave my spankings & get sad when I can not get them regulary. It is sad that more women are not aware of this and that spanking has to be so taboo in main streem culture.
The best spanking experience I have had with my wife was when my cousin visited us for a weekend, and she offended him badly…. after an apology, I took her aside and told her that she needed for HIM to give her a spanking across her bare heinie for forgiveness, and to my shock, she relented. So she dropped her pants and underpants and bent over his knee, and again asked for forgiveness, I suggested 50 hard swats, which he administered quite powerfully, she cried, was horribly embarassed, and afterward, she had a much better attitude
Yes, wives should be spanked. Since your readers are undoubtedly familiar with most of the reasons, I will only offer here two which are somewhat subtle.
(1) Wives should be spanked just before going out for the evening, say to a dinner party, and you want to enjoy the unspoken but shocked horror on women’s faces, and the snickering, winks, and nudges of the men, as they notice that whenever she sits, she winces and squirms a little.
(2) Wives should be spanked when you will be mounting her from behind (“doggy style”), and you want to enjoy how she flinches when your lower abdomen rubs against her reddened, tender buttocks still burning from the pain of a good paddling.
I get spanked now and again, mostly as a teasing “you’ve been naughty” kind of thing. (I’m not a bad girl, but I love to tease!) I do wish I knew women in my area who also get spanked by their husbands. It would be nice to have someone who understands this. Anyone out there in Des Moines?
I don’t mind being spanked when I’ve done something wrong but why should I be spanked when I haven’t? I don’t need a ‘reminder’ every week. I know very well what to expect when I misbehave. As for women having spankable bottoms mine was made for sitting on as well and I like to do this without any discomfort.
The Man should be the head of the relationship, period. Call me a dinosaur (hard to do since I’m only 30, but go ahead and try), but that’s how it should be. I’ve been married for 10 1/2 years and my Husband isn’t shy about checking me when I get out of line. I don’t agree with the “reminders,” though part of that may be because I tend to get into enough by myself! (I’m a natural redhead, go figure!) I wouldn’t trade our relationship for anything in the world, though! :)
I get spanked every day, whether I have transgressed or not. It sounds harsh, but since my husaband started spanking me to keep me in order our marriage is much better. It hurts but he is much happier and sometimes instead of giving me six of the best he is kinder now and just gives me about 2 and makes me write lines, again it is a bit humiliating but he is happy so so am i.
i am spanked when im being bad but never hard…just enough for the point to come acrossed u better get it together…sometimes i am put to bed afterwards…it depends on if i relent or stay cranky. i think spanking is a good thing if both are in agreement on the issue..it helps us girls maintain some balance if done outta love not anger. alao it can relieve stress if u work too much or have alot of pressure on u constantly..good to let go and cry it out.
My husband and I have been together for 16 years and for 16 years he’s been spanking me when he thinks I deserve it. I can’t say that I always agree with him at the time, but he somehow manages to being me around to his way of thinking.
I don’t get reminder spankings, I do however get stress reliever spankings, that’s what my husband calls them. They mostly happen when I haven’t really done anything wrong, but I’m out of sorts and cranky. I’ll admit that they do the trick and I usually sleep like a baby afterwards.
Yes, wives should be spanked! I’ve been married for 12 years and my husband has always spanked me! I regularly find myself over his knee, my bottom bared and being given a good hard spank. He just reddens my bottom, never leaves any lasting marks or bruises. It’s great for both of us.
Another spanked wife here. I am spanked for disciplinary purposes when I break any of our agreed-upon rules, and also for stress-relief if needed. It is always done firmly but lovingly and makes me feel very secure. From his point of view it helps clear up issues with no lingering bad feeling. Works really well for us!
Yes I agree wives should be spanked. I have found that a I need a good hard bare bottom spanking as well. It helps with my attitude and out look on things as well as a good stress reliever! We were slow getting into spankings; but I have benefitted from them and probably should have had them all along. It is never too late …and a girl is never too old for a proper spanking or paddling!!
Absolutely a wife should be spanked by her husband. I get spanked on a weekly basis for bad attitude or for stress relief, and it works! I usually get is over the knee or on the bed with two pillows under by stomach. It always starts out with the back of the hand and usually finish with a wide wooden paddle, or back of a hairbrush. The sting definitely keeps me grounded! The spanking I receive are well deserved.
My husband spanks me. Usually with his belt. I asked him years ago if we could have a domestic discipline relationship. It was very slow going, many conversations about it. Light almost worthless spankings at first. Now he can wield that belt like a pro! I feel loved and secure in our relationship. Not so much because I’m a spanked wife, but because he loves me enough to give me what I asked for and need!
Yes wives should be spanked on a regular basis. Over the knee with a bare bottom while he uses a paddle is the best method. A sore bottom for a couple of days is a good reminder to behave and be a good wife. Without the spankings I become cranky and mouthy. If I am disobedient or disrespectful my bottom gets a good discipline session, without warning.
Yes wives should be spanked. I’m so sick of hearing wives in malls yelling at their husbands and embarrassing them. I also dislike gossipy women. I can’t believe what wimps some men are today who let wives verbally batter them. I think it should be legal for a husband to spank a wife with his bare hand, as long as he does no lasting damage. If I’m verbally mouthy and disrespectful, I’m over his knee in the bedroom having my panties pulled down and his big strong hand spanking my bare backside until I’m sobbing and apologizing profusely.
I think a lot more of this goes on than may people realize. There is a difference between asking us if we get spanked and asking us if we’ve been spanked. Getting something implies ongoing event. It might be in the recent past or anticipated in the foreseeable future. Been suggests sometime in the past.
If a bridezilla was spanked by her mother, father, aunt, or fiance on her wedding day, she could truthfully claim that she doesn’t get spanked. The same thing would be true if a wife was spanked one by her husband for calling her mother (her mother-in-law) a bitch. A wife soundly spanked twice during her seven year marriage might also make the same claim. Potential examples are endless. Yet, the anecdotal evidence abounds in family stories and neighborhood gossip of wive, girlfriends, moms, aunts, mother-in-laws, etc. winding up over someone’s knee after exceptional misbehavior.
Should wives be spanked ? I don ‘t think there is a ” yes” or “no ” answer to that question . I have been maried twice . My first wife would have never accepted to be spanked ! She probably would have tried to hit me with a frying pan if I even mentioned it !Because of that bad temper is one of the reasons we got divorced . My second wife ( that I took time and precautions to find ) is the exact oppisite ! She needs to feel , taken care off , watched over , disciplined , and yes , sometimes spanked , only when she really deserves it . Never too hard , never with an implement , just with the hand on her bottom . That always does the trick and puts her back in line . This method , I don ‘t use very often , but we have been married for 12 years and we are both happily married . What itches me , are those comments from people saying we sick in our heads ! Not everyone likes root beer and not everyone likes champagne : be tolerant !!!! I repeat , there is not a yes or no answer to that question !
I don’t think it’s for every wife. Non consensual spanking doesn’t work and I don’t think discipline spanking works either. However, I love being spanked. I want a good spanking once or twice a week. I ask for them. I’m not kidding at all and this is the honest truth. I spend a good half hour over my husband’s knee getting my bare bottom spanked. It keeps me calm and the endorphin rush is great. It’s a long spanking and it stings, but it doesn’t leave any lasting marks. He starts slowly and works it up. He stops from time to time. He knows how to do it to get that endorphin rush I love. I think if wives knew how calm it could make you if done right, they’d want them. Some men want them for this reason too. I’m glad I’m married to my spanker, as it’s a very intimate act. He would never want to do it to discipline me, but this keeps me so calm, he doesn’t have to! lol. Sometimes if I act up he jokes around and tells me I’m in for a good spanking. Totally hot. I’ve been married 20 years!
I spank my wife when she is getting stressed out. She gets a good cry and after she is much more relaxed and composed. For us spanking is always over the knee and starts and ends with my hands. If I don’t spank her, her level of stress builds and it usually takes the hairbrush to get her to release all of her stress. We have been married since 1986. We don’t argue, no fighting and we are enjoying sex every day twice. I love her more now than when we first got married. She is the light of my life and our family is paterned after a 1950’s family. She is a stay at home mom (recently). We homeschool our kids and in our family the men and boys where pants and the women and daughter wear dress’s and skirts. We live a Christian Domestic Discipline life style. I know many of you may judge this but how many of married couple have sex twice a day and have been married 25 years and there is absolutely no fighting or argueing.
Here’s my story… I married a man 14 years older then me. I was such an immature mouthy 22 year old at the time. I soon found my panties being yanked down and being pulled over his knee, getting my bare behind tanned but good by his hand. He moved on to a wicked wooden hairbrush that I dreaded. I would scream, shout and try to get out of it. He never left any bruises, just a bright red backside that hurt for two days. I’m an older woman now and years ago, it never occurred to me that a man couldn’t spank his wife. I was spanked a lot, but I had to grow up. I don’t advise it and it’s not legal these days, but years ago you couldn’t go to the police, as they’d laugh at you. I came from a Catholic family where divorce wasn’t an option back then. After a year of being spanked for my attitude and hating every embarrassing bare backside spanking over his knee, I decided I’d better change the way I mouthed off to my husband. He did move on to use his belt, by making me bend over the bed and stick my butt out… and that finally got through to me. I was a spoiled youngest child and he was an eldest child. I did grow up and he’d never think of spanking me now, unless it was sexual or kidding around. He was never unfair about it. I really was an obnoxious brat who cursed him out. He’d never talk to me the way I talked to him. We get along great, but I was rather abusive to him verbally if things did not go my way. He then felt a good old fashioned spanking for my childish attitude, was warranted. If I acted like a child, I got spanked like one. My parents never spanked me. We get on fine and today it’s considered abuse, but I wouldn’t change a thing about the past. I grew up and learned to curb my obnoxious mouth. It was hard on our marriage as it took on a daddy/daughter relationship. Once I grew up, we were equals and he felt no need to spank me. Once in a while he’ll joke around and swat my backside, but it’s not like the old days of me wishing I had not cursed him out. It hurt like anything and I soon regretted my actions.
I have been married for six years
and I am a very happy loved, honoured,
cherished, and spanked wife!!
Unlike what some may believe about women
or wives like me is that I actually was
the one that brought this lifestyle
choice to my husband..he agreed that it was
something that would be beneficial
to our marriage!
I might not always like or agree with the spanking
but I submit because I whole heartedly believe
my husband’s God given priveledge, right and
place in the home is the loving, caring, providing,
and yes ‘correcting’ leader!!!
In this day and age the place of the
husband has been dumified…. If I treat
my husband that way I would find myself bare bottomed
bent over my husbands knee receiving MANY painful
swats with a thick wooden paddle to the point that sitting
would be unpleasant for at least a week!! And rightfully so!!!!
Some men of todays generation need to grow a set, stand up and be the
leader that their home needs!!!
Furthermore, both of my sistets and
many of my friends and peers have
all had failed marriages and many of
them have asked us what our secret
is…we dont devulge about my
discipline as we beleieve that info
belongs only between us and behind
our doors…but its sad really as I
think all wives should have the loving
guidence and correction from their
husbands giving them the opportunity
to flourish in their God given role as
a submissive nurturing helpmeet
enabling their husbands to rise to their
rigtful place as the protector and guardian
life then becomes a peaceful harmonious
and blissfull place!
With all that being said…DD is definetly
not for couples whom struggle with
any type of abuse!! Or a husband with
a record of aggression or violent tempers!!
Also, it is my beleif that husbands
that spank their wives should have a good
handle on his anger as not to spank
for the sole purpose of retrobution
but for the betterment of the marriage.
I dont beleive that it is always wrong
for a husband to spank in anger…
infact some of my best lessons have
been learned while my bare backside
was being very thouroughly and delibertly
very painfully whipped by my angry husbands
belt!! Some conversations are better and
more quickly understood and obeyed through my bottom!!
I gotta admit, this post and a lot of the comments turned me on. I always liked it a little rough in bed, and sometimes my husband actually spanks me hard enough to leave his hand print on my backside when he takes me from behind, but I never really thought about it as a spanking fetish until now. Thank you!
Well, I cannot speak for all married couples, but I can say that spanking works perfectly in my marriage and has done so for the 16 years, my beloved husband and I have been together.
His punishments keep me in line and make me feel loved and secured – and very feminine!
His whippings are always very painful, and I definitely do not enjoy that pain it self, but I enjoy my husband for giving them to me, as I know that they are given out of love and for my own good!
I love him for that – and for a lot of other reasons!
Women need to heat up their erogenous zones to become aroused; either by tanning in the hot sun, sitting on a radiator or by spanking.
I was married 10 years before my wife blew the rent on a handbag one day, and her mum told both her and me that she deserved a hot bottom, and would phone back to ensure she had it. Later in the bedroom, she stood by my lap and seeked reassurance before being bent over and having her pristine size 36 tanned.
Nowadays she’s more recalcitrant, but agrees that her womanly size 42 still needs a husband’s firm hand occasionally?
my partner and myself have been together for nearly two years now ,when we met he had been previously living the 1950,s household lifestyle with another girl .when it got stale the relationship failed…his needs were not being met . he never really loved that person he says ,he always felt she was trying to please him ,not need what he thought she needed which was a spanking now and then . when he met me i hadn’t previously lived his lifestyle . i was very outspoken self willed ..then i got the first spanking for my bad mouth ..hated it . hated him for a short while , sulked like a child .. ,then soon realised out much it helped me .. .gone is the outspoken drama queen .the dis -trust i had on occasions have become almost nil now , the spankings are given every week as a maintance spanking ,and i would not dare answer him back like i used to ,Now i feel happy inside my own skin ,my self esteem has climbed to heights unknown before . He treats me like a princess all the time ,but insisted on the lifestyle if we were to be together ..now .madly in Love we no we have something Special .
I posted above. I am surprised that many young wives would need a spanking after the first year or two of marriage. I mean, sexually, sure, he spanks me good and hard as Paul said to heat up the erogenous zones. Years ago as a new wife, it was for punishment and it only took me a year to watch my mouth. My husband never spanked me for messing up and I don’t spend money we don’t have. I guess I never needed a spanking for anything other than attitude. It took a year of one red hot backside for me to not want that. Sexual spanking yes. A man can’t be abusive, has to be above reproach. He has to set an example. He can’t be a jerk or unfair. He has to control his temper. My husband used to walk away for quite a while until his temper was under control. Spankings usually were not immediate, but I was told to expect one and get ready for one. I hated the wait and having to strip from waist down and having to get the hairbrush. Punishment spankings really hurt and were totally embarrassing. I got the long lecture in between the smacks with the wooden hairbrush. It took forever that way and to be over someone’s knee or the bed, with your panties at your ankles is quite embarrassing. Sexual is different. I guess I don’t see why wives need it after a couple of years. I guess perhaps the sexual spankings I receive do keep me submissive. Perhaps that’s the answer. Sometimes I read posts from men on bulletin boards complaining about their wives and the bad attitudes… and I want to scream at them, be a man and spank the daylights out of her bare behind and she’ll think twice about being nasty to you next time. lol. I don’t though, because then people are shocked. I think men are afraid of being arrested or divorced. I think men should introduce it as a sexual thing and then sneak in the real spankings when they need to.
Susanne took the words right out of my mouth. I feel very much loved, secured and extremely feminine and submissive when my husband spanks me. We’re both approaching our thirties now and have been married for 9 years now. The first time my husband spanked me we had only been married for a couple of weeks and I was 19 years old and in one of those mouthy moods that teenagers, especially teen aged girls get into. I was working as a teller at a bank at that time and he was working for a construction company and both of us had just gotten home from work. Anyway, one word led to another and then he put me over his knee. I was wearing a short skirt and high heeled sandals and as soon as he put me over his knee, he pulled my panties down around my knees and gave me such a spanking. I was crying and so humiliated. But then he wiped away my tears and kissed me. I felt so much better and we went into the bedroom to do what all newlyweds love to do (blushing and smiling). The lovemaking was so good too. Every time he’s spanked me it seems the lovemaking is better than ever. Now we have three boys with a fourth on the way. He still spanks me, but only when I deserve it and not when I’ve been pregnant. The women’s libber types would all call me a traitor, but I think it’s only natural for the husband to wear the pants of the family and the wife to submit to him. I’m not a doormat, but my husband has the final word and that’s the way it should be. And like Steve said about his wife in his post, a good spanking helps relieve any stress that has built up. And like Steve’s wife, during and right after a good spanking I always have a good cry and then any stress is gone and my husband nearly always takes me into his arms and we make terrific love. Our favorite position is doggy style and I love the way he enters me with long, slow strokes at first sometimes massaging my tummy and boobs and sometimes slapping my already red butt. But I’ve noticed that my moans and sighs make him longer, thicker and harder during those times too. I guess it’s no surprise how I got pregnant four times in nine years…LOL. And now I’m a stay at home wife and mom and couldn’t be happier.
My partner and myself are not married, and have been dating for 6 years, I suggested to my boyfriend that we should start a DD relationship, he read a lot of information and soon agreed with it, starting with a couple of rules which were, no swearing, no smoking, no driving without a seatbelt, angry fits (where I throw stuff and break it and yell a lot) and no cleaning up after myself. 1.5 into our DD relationship, I was so angry I was smashing stuff and the thing that I smashed was his grandmothers dinner plate set, and I smoked and also was yelling and swearing at him, he went for a drive to calm down and when he came back he didn’t say a word just took me by the hand and into the bedroom where he took down my pants and underwear, and put me over his knee, he started with his hand with medium spanks and got harder and harder, for about 300 spanks then he got up sat me on the bed for 5 minutes then came with a wooden spoon where he spanked me 50 times hard I was now crying at this point, i told him he was hurting me, he just said if you didnt act the way you did you wouldnt be getting these you are hurtting yourself, he sat me on the bed again for 5 minutes then came back and took his belt of and spanked me about 100 times the last ten were really really hard, and it left me with a little bruise on my ass, after her held me and said that he didn’t like my behavior and that it really upset him.
I agree that wives should get spanked when their husbands see fit. Most of the guys of today are having a gender identity issue and might as well just don a skirt and paint their frigging nails….the way they let women disrespect them. It’s pathetic. A good hard spanking that will leave her tearful and remorseful would put an end to this but most guys aren’t man enough to take charge and instead allow the woman to wear the pants. It’s downright ridiculous is what it is.
My husband makes me help him **** other women. Afterward, he takes me over his knee and spanks my bare bottom until I admit that watching him is good for me. It is so humiliating and so hot at the same time; it makes me desperate to have him myself.
Married for almost 30 years. My husband started spanking me on our honeymoon and he hasn’t stopped. He spanks me for a variety of reasons (Fun, discipline, stress relief, attitude adjustment, disrespect towards him, or just because he feels like it). I’m glad he is man enough to do it and accept his authority over me to do this. I never argue when he decides to spank me. I just bare my bottom and go over his knee. Sometimes he spanks me sofly with just his hand or a small paddle if he is happy with me. If I have earned the spanking it is usually pretty hard and long and he used belts , swithes, and heavy paddles.I always love him exceptoioally after I am spanked. In this day when everyone works its good to know he is still in charge. I hate it when I my freinds speak rudely to thire husbans in public or brag about what they said to him at home. Some also brag about denying their husbands sex. I cannot imagine treating my husband so badly. Our marriage is happier because he spanks me when I need it.
Not really. I think if both parties agree on it (Cause a relationship to me and my boyfriend is about fairness, equality, and free will to do/think/act how we want) We don’t suffocate each other. we have lives apart from each other, and try not to bud in unless we agree that it’s necessary. If both parties agree on domestic discipline I think that they should make a list of rules for EACHOTHER. TOGETHER. FOR BOTH PARTIES TO FOLLOW. :) So that they can agree and not be controlling cause men aren’t gods.
Nor are women godesses. we’re all people, we all make mistakes. we’re all equally smart and my boyfriend thinks I’m even stronger then he is. Mentally of course. I’m more determined, and I’m trying to help him reach his dream as he’s helping me reach miine. And I’ve gone through more in my life. I’ve lost my parents at a very young age. (8 years old) , I’m not that old btw. 19. been physically/mentally abused (not necessarily always at home (very rarely physical at home) Mentally, yes. Bullied at school physically and mentally, and a lot more things so he has so much respect for me.
He knows I can take care of myself and dont want to be babied. Cause I can think for myself. I can fight. I can do things for myself since I was raised a tomboy.
He gave me a tap yesterday (just playing around) and I tapped him back. As for spank me for not agreeing with him, he’d NEVER EVER DO THAT. Cause he knows that we both have our own opinions. I doubt he’d want this relationship. but it turned me on. I can think for myself. and I suppose that being spank for sexual reasons also turns me on. But I wouldn’t mind the agreed upon rules and spanking each other for breaking them. as long as we’re both equals because I think for myself. he thinks for himself.
Yes, my husband spanks me. I’ve been married 25 years. My husband started to swat my butt when we were first married. He used to grab my arm, turn me sideways and swat me a few times really hard to get his point across if he didn’t like my attitude. I was stunned at first. He sexually spanked me lightly for fun. As time went on, I was rather destructive to my marriage with my mouth. I was disrespectful, wouldn’t stop arguing when asked to and cursed him out a few times. He has never done those things to me. I was treating my husband horribly, until he took me over his knee one day, lifted my skirt and yanked down my panties. I kept trying to get off of his lap, but he spanked me good and hard with his hand until his hand couldn’t take it anymore. I was a very sorry, sobbing crying wife. He now will not hesitate to take the back of a good sized hairbrush to my backside. He has a point. He treats me better than I treat him. I need to be reminded not to be a screaming shrew to him and to have some respect. I don’t talk to anyone as poorly as I talk to my husband. I’m glad he’s man enough to put me over his knee and bare my backside for a good long hard spanking. Yes, he spanks me when I need it and being destructive towards my marriage, is needing it. I’m much better now and mostly get maintenance spankings once a week. I get the hairbrush and bend over his lap. He likes to be the one to bare my bottom or sometimes he tells me I need a bit of humility and asked me to get totally undressed. It’s humbling to stand naked in front of him while being told why I’m getting a spanking I deserve. Usually he warns me once to stop my destructive behavior or face a spanking. I do get a warning first. Sometimes I want the spanking and take the hairbrush and bring it to him and get over his lap. Usually when I’m PMS, I need a good paddling with the hairbrush. He also spanks me with his hand and that’s for light maintenance. I never deny my husband sex, because usually the spanking gives me an endorphin rush like someone mentioned. After a good spanking, I usually want sex and affection. We make up and I’m not sure I can change the person I am. I have a short fuse and my husband considers me his equal, but sometimes I get on my high horse and need to be spanked back to his level. I totally respect him for it and he has never spanked me when I didn’t need it. Like Marie above, my husband also spanks me for all the reasons she listed. Do I liked to be spanked? NO, it hurts!
We spank strictly because it turns us on. We briefly (very) tried DD, and it just didn’t work. I would have to spank so hard and so long (because she is a die hard spanko) it almost felt abusive to me. It also seemed sophomoric. If anything, if punishment were needed, withholding of spankings would be far more effective. The real discipline would ruin something that has worked so well for us. I spank for fun, sex, because I can, as well as some mood enhancements. She has a safe word, but I can not remember the last time it was used.
So should you spank you spouse. Absolutely, if she consents/wants it.
Yes for sure. My husband loves to spank me and quite often makes me straddle his one knee afterwards and he bounces me up and down like a child to ensure I know my place. He generally sits on his favorite bar stool with his right knee flexed and simply points to his knee and tells me Id better be over it damn quickly if I know what is good for me. He is almost 1 ft taller than me and he loves it when I cant touch the floor on either side. Sometimes he lets me rest on his other knee but when he thinks I need discipline he lets me simply hang with my ass exposed and no escape.
He spanks me only with his hand generally it lasts 20-30 minutes.
So I put myself over his knee on command and take my punishment.
I suppose I am the old fashioned type. I’m one who believes that spankings are good for relationships. But the man I’m with doesn’t think like that. How do I tell him that I think this is what we need?
Jamie, just tell him what you need. Most men are willing to try it if you ask. Once he sees how much you like it and need it, I bet it will be something he looks forwards to.
I am a strong, independent and successful woman but I like that I married a man who takes the lead and is unafraid of bending me over for a hard spanking when I need it or just whenever he wants. My husband considers me his intellectual equal and makes my needs a priority just as I make his needs my priority. When we get in our heads or let ourselves doubt this dynamic due to our inherent commitment to equality we both suffer- less sex, more arguments, more pettiness. When he is spanking me about weekly or so and leading, we have sex 7-10 times a week and we basically never fight. I take better care of him and he of me. I am not going to generalize my needs as being every woman’s but I do think there is something biologically fitting to a male dominant/female submitting dynamic. Certainly it is far from uncommon.
My husband also spanks me whenever he thinks I need it. He also considers me his intellectual equal. He spoils me rotten and is very chivalrous. He treats me like a lady, so he doesn’t put up with a lady that turns into a brat and a shrew. I can have quite a temper and the only way I calm down is with a good old fashioned otk spanking. It does make our sex life a lot better. Less fighting, more sex and he likes the male dominate/female submissive dynamic. I have a harder time with it. My inner feminist sometimes fights this. A good tanning of my bared backside whilst over his knee, makes me respect him for taking me in hand. There can only be one head of the household and if it’s the wife, the man is a wimp. She won’t respect him, won’t give him sex and will tear him to shreds with her mouth. I’m not a second class citizen in my house. I’m treated like a queen, until the brat in me comes out trying to control him and everything around me. He spanks long and hard until I realize that I’m not in control and I have to give it up to feel calm. The male dominate/female submissive dynamic works. That doesn’t mean the man is cruel to her mentally or doesn’t take care of her. If anything, he takes care of her more than she can imagine. This isn’t about a guy who’s a bully or mean. It’s about a man who takes control back. If I try to control everything around me and control him, I’m not a happy camper. It is biologically fitting as Katie said and it does not mean the woman doesn’t go out and become successful in the world. If anything she’s more successful, because she’s calmer for it. It doesn’t mean she will be submissive to all men. She will only be submissive to one man. She can go out and conquer the world, but in her marriage she will be happier if she knows her man has her back and her backside in check. A husband should bare his wife’s backside himself and put her over his knee with her backside perched high… so she is bared and humbled before him, with nothing hidden. He should spank her good, long and hard, until she gives up control. He shouldn’t stop until she is calm and accepts that he is the dominant partner. He should then take her and make love to her and dominate her in sex. A hot backside and hot sex go together. It does wonders for a marriage… besides, why do you think women are reading romance novels where the male spanks and dominants the women? ;-)
I was an independent woman in my first marriage and I ran the show. My husband didn’t discipline the kids – mine didn’t discipline me either. In our marriage I took on all the worry and responsibility. Couldn’t take it any more.
Then years after divorce I met this wonderful guy, one I had gone to school with. He’s very gentle and soft spoken, treats me like the most precious thing in life. One day I reverted to prior behavior and began telling him what to do about a financial matter, I knew best of course, I’d been handling it for fifteen years.
Imagine my shock when he pulled me to the bedroom and ordered me to take off everything! I said no way and got some unexpected ‘help’. He’s a whole lot taller than I am and strong. I was so mad, but I was smart enough not to scream at him over it because he was already angry. He didn’t yell but he didn’t relent either.
When he sat in the chair in the bedroom he pulled me down over his lap and it felt pretty precarious, then he grabbed my brush off the dresser and what a shock I got. He was serious, too, this wasn’t any timid five swats and I was up. I didn’t count them, I was fighting until I realized I was just making it a lot worse. He ordered me to spread my legs and at that point I did. The pain was absolutely excruciating.
When I thought I might pass out from the pain he stood me up then prodded me to the bed. Well, turns out his finale to a spanking is doggy style and not always in the conventional place. That was my first experience with anal sex which – who knew – turned me on so much that now I sometimes I’d get out of hand on purpose. He always knows, the spanking is intense.
We don’t have any formal thing or scheduled, but we do have signals that initiate erotic spankings which are very arousing. And a lot less painful!
But I have to admit, there are days when I’m just lazy or bitchy. The lazy is only a problem when I’m avoiding something I promised I’d get done, or something that is actually my responsibility due to schedules, etc. I don’t attack him personally/verbally and I really, really hate it when I deserve to be paddled. He’s bought a couple of paddles now, seems like it happens weekly some months – I had two weeks when he decreed every night. Bounced a check.
I really do love him, being with him is pretty easy but sometimes I see that look on his face when I get negative – then sometimes I do it deliberately and he knows it. Doesn’t mean I don’t get my 40 or 50 strokes. No yummy sex.
I’ve been begging my husband for years to spank me, but sadly he wont do it. Maybe some day. However, I feel really uncomfortable with some of the comments here that sound like non-consensual spanking of wives by husbands. Maybe SpankingBlog owner here should write a primer on what consensual spanking looks like. There are some good examples in the comments, e.g., getting general agreement on spanking triggers beforehand.
Robert is right. I’m a spanko and my husband began to feel like his spankings bordered on abuse. DD spanking didn’t work for us, because I can take a lot and I’d want it. Once he saw I had bruises, he couldn’t do DD. He felt it was abuse and it turned him off. It is sophomoric. He only spanks for fun now. Well_No also has a good point. DD should be consensual and rules made clear. Also a husband can’t go too far. I don’t think spanking works at all, but then again I’m a die hard spanko. You do get an endorphin rush and it’s like a drug, so that’s why Robert is right on with this.
I agree DD should be consentual and talked through thoroughly…it is not for everyone. Myself and my Man naturally fell into it as he is some decades older than myself and I had even run away at the start of our relationship (I know immature) so after hugs and relief he proceeded to bare my bottom and spread and spank me. I fought, but after a long hand spanking, it was back to hugs and reassurances it was done out of love. I get spanked occasionally, but with a warning before hand so I know it is coming. (nothing like an evening out with him and getting ‘the look’ and spending the rest of the evening knowing what is coming. Once I was marched out to the parking garage and spanked in our car and then returned to our table to finish dinner squirming.
Unlike many husbands or men that participate in this and other conversations regarding wife spanking I don’t believe in nor practice “punishment” of my wife. I also don’t believe in nor practice the use of a belt or other device for the purposes of my wife’s regular maintenance spankings. Her bottom is bare and so is my hand. Like other comments I have read we believe it is the wife’s responsibility to remove her own panties prior to a maintenance spanking. This her way of acknowledging her acceptance of this lifestyle and reinforcing the fact that she is a willing participant – and believer in – the benefit of a husband maintaining his wife’s attitude, outlook and behavior through regular maintenance spankings. Maintenance spanking is not done out of anger, but rather done out of love.
Punishment spanking is the result of a husband’s lack of maintenance of his wife’s best interests and in my mind – a poor behavior on the part of the husband. Ongoing and regular maintenance spankings with a husbands bare hand on to her bare bottom enables her to get back to a clear vision and behavior in her life.
Maintenance spankings are not HARD and are not intended to hurt the wife. They are firm and forceful, but not HARD. HARD is out of anger and frankly due to the husbands or man’s neglect of his wife in the first place. With regular and loving maintenance spankings bad behavior simply does not happen.
To prepare my wife for a maintenance spanking she knows to wear a specific pair of panties set aside only for maintenance spankings. By wearing these panties it has become her indication to me that she is accepting of and prepared for my love and guidance through a spanking. This way allows her to participate in the process, have a say in the process, and to prepare her mind and heart for what is coming.
Once the spanking session takes place, she naturally makes her way to a quiet corner for 10-minutes to give her the opportunity to contain her emotions and find the peace of mind she is seeking. Once this time is up, she seeks me out, puts her panties back on and asks me to hold her – followed by a kiss and a Thank You.
I’m not a Christian, but am in a DD with my lovely wife.
She is very very rarely spanked, and we only do it if she has been severely out of line (i.e., overcooking my breakfast, snoring, etc.), but rather than spank her on her ass like most people, we spank her vagina and underarms. Let me tell you, I haven’t had firm eggs in months.
We practice a REVERSE form DD, probably because we play so hard already. We are not 24/7 unfortunately and won’t be for a long time. To use spanking as a punishment would have to be way beyond either of our comfort zones (and as stated we play quite hard), that it possible gets to the point of harm. Since our time is too limited, I use the threat of NOT getting a spanking most effectively. The look on her face when I threaten not to spank her is priceless. And it works quite well. I always though a punishment should be unpleasant for both parties. One shouldn’t be getting a hard on while the other is made to feel shame (or whatever). This serves us well. The message gets across. I can remember only two times when I had to withhold a spanking and both of us were not happy campers.
If I ever had to use spanking as a punishment, it would drastically diminish the fun (and hot sex) we have with spankings. The redder her bottom the better the sex.
It has come to the point of just the mere suggestion of no spanking brings a stop to the behavior. Only twice have I had to go to the final warning.
I wonder if someone ever overheard me threatening not to spank her, what the reaction would be.
Bobby D mentioned a while ago the he spanked his wife on vagina and underarms. Even though I have never had my vagina punished, my husband also frequently uses “alternative” part of my body to punish – such as my back, the palms of my hands or even the soles of my feet. The really contributes to keeping me in line!
I get spanked on the bare bottom regularly both for discipline and for maintenance. Thinking of what Susanne said, sometimes I’m made to push my little lips as far back as possible between my legs so that the strap sometimes catches them.That makes me jump and makes me behave!
I am trying ti get my Husband on board with DD. We have only been married for a year, but I have wanted it from the start. I bought a large wood hairbrush at Target that we have used. Last weekend I worked up the nerve to show him a paddle web site and say I wanted to order one and hoped he would spank me once a week. It came in the mail yesterday and I am nervous. It will help with my attitude and sharp tone I think..
I’ll never forget the first time my husband spanked me when we were first married. I remember getting snippy with him and having an attitude. The next thing I knew, he grabbed my arm and turned me sideways and gave me some good hard swats on my backside over my jeans as if I were three years old. I remember being horrified and embarrassed. After that he never did it again. He was horrified with himself. However, I realized I needed spankings. It’s consensual and I had a lot to do to convince him that he did the right thing and I needed more. I have to come to him and submit myself. I bring him the special hairbrush he uses. Once I’m standing there waiting, he totally undresses me. Nothing is hidden during a spanking and I submit my body to him. I never stop being embarrassed with this, but he insists on me hiding nothing from him. He guides me over his lap and asks me what is bothering me. Usually it’s just built up guilt that I need to release or stress. He listens to me and then spanks me long and hard. I don’t like the spankings, but I need it. He holds me afterwards and I usually cry and release so much garbage. It totally should be consensual.
Within reason its ok but i had worn a new skirt to work in the summer which my husband had not seem untill i turned home he want mad called me everything you could think of want outside and turned with a long cane he said i am going to make sure you dont wear that skirt to work again if you dont accept this pack your bags and leave i was checked and just said sorry ok he caned me for so long i dont know how mamy times he caned my bottom and all the way down the backs of my legs the marks stayed for several weeks so it was tights or longer skirt for most of the summer since the he seems to think it is ok to cane my bottom for any little reason which i can put up with but the pain that the cane caused on the backs of my legs never again i think he knows he want to far but i always check first befor teasing a new skirt
My partner of 12 years has recently started spanking me. It started out as spankings during sex. He likes to be the dominate one. And considering he is over twice my size it’s not hard for him to be. Now its when I have been unfair or mouthy with him. If I have been disrespecful during the day I will get a spanking that night. I don’t know why but I feel so much calmer and happier afterwards and so much more loving towards him. Two people cannot be the head of the household and now I am understanding that. I like to be looked after and he does a good job at providing for us. Before the spankings started we were always fighting and were even on the verge of breaking up. Now that I have submitted to him to a degree things are alot better. I like my spankings and I know it makes him feel good giving them to me. We definatley have a closer relationship now.
My husband spanks me. We’ve been married for 8 years and he has spanked me from the start if I show him disrespect or I disobey his orders. I received a spanking last Sunday morning. I was out with friends on the Saturday evening celebrating one of my friends birthday. I was supposed to be back at 11pm. I was an hour late as I lost all track of time. Also my skirt was too short. I’m to wear skirts no higher than my knees and not five inches above my like the one I was wearing. He was furious and ordered me to bed and that we will sort this out in the morning. Well the next after I had cooked his breakfast I was across his knee with my skirt raised and my knickers around my knees and I got the spanking I deserved. I’m grateful to him I am a better person after the spankings. I think a man should be a man and head of the household. It’s his duty to discipline me when I need it.
I get spanked sometimes when I deserve it. Normally he bends me over his knee and uses his open hand on my bare bottom and if I am really bad I get the belt or paddel. Normally until Im crying and have a red bottom. he then put me in the corner for however long he says I have to stay there and if I move or touch my bottom I go back over his knee for the same treatment.
I get spanked if I disobey a direct order, lie, or be disrespectful. Normally he grabs me and puts me over his knee (and sometimes in frot of people if embarrassment will do me good) the smacks my bottom until he thinks Ive learned my lesson, depending on the severity of my offense, pants and undies may come down and I may get belted, paddled, or just a warm up with the hand. Afterwards, corner time with my rear showing so he can slap it if I move or anthing if I don’t move, don’t get put back over his knee and he holds me while I cry and rubs my sore bottom. if I do move, I get put back over his knee for the same treatment
Mine should, yes. We practice DD in our home and when discipline is indicated it is delivered. My doll is a bit of a spoiled girl. I give her anything she asks for, do anything for her, and rarely tell her “no” on anything. I love her dearly, but rules are rules. She usually gets it for her mouth, acting out, not following through on things, poor (very poor) communication and making life difficult, but mostly for not meeting personal goals related to health and fitness.
Love and respect are the most important factors in this way of life, for us. DD, for us, is about accountability to each other primarily, but also about her submission to her man. She is a strong and wonderful woman and I have so much appreciation for her compliance and dedication to our life and relationship. Anyone who thinks only a weak woman who would accept correction and discipline should meek my Jayne. She has a master’s in business, a six figure income, has raised three children and is full of piss and vinegar every day. My hat is off to all of you wonderful women who find love, fulfillment, comfort and belonging in this kind of relationship.
We started with D/d when we started out. It was rarely needed. Most of our arguments were settled pretty easily – she has a great disposition and is quite naturally submissive (to me – though quite dominant outside the home). D/d was here idea and we tried it. It was so infrequent, but she wanted the idea of D/d. Technically we still are, but it’s been years since her last discipline. We ARE diehard spankos and I have unlimited consent to spank whenever I wish. In practice, I read her so well – I will spank when I know she is ready/able (which thank God is still frequently). The only limit she stated upfront was caning (my second favorite). However, my word is my bond – no caning ever – nor was there ever the threat of one. It has worked well for us. I am in my mid 50’s and she’s in her 30’s (actually 40’s but won’t admit it). Our relationship always was first. Spanking kink/ or D/d or bdsm or whatever you want to call it was always to enhance our relationship, it was not primary. To answer the initial questions: Wives should be spanked; if they want to be. If not, there is no more intrinsic right to spanking her than she has a right to slap me.
[Paragraph removed that Bob knew might not survive moderation. Sorry, Bob, but you're right -- I simply cannot allow anyone here tell someone else that their DD relationship is "abuse". That's not the sort of judgement a stranger on the internet can or should make. -- SpankBoss]