Spanking Blog: Adult Erotic Spanking At Its Best

How did I miss this? Apparently last fall our very favorite blogging dominatrix Mistress Matisse did a spanking shoot for EverythingButt.com. During the course of which, she got to enjoy spanking Bobbi Starr:

Of course she took a few additional liberties, as who would not?

And then more spanking, this time in an over-the-knee position:

The spanking ended as they do, with clutching of bottom:

But of course, Mistress Matisse was not even close to done with poor Bobbi Starr. Here she is, stripped of her pantyhose and waiting helplessly as Mistress Matisse rummages through the drawer labeled “Enormous Butt Plugs”…

See Also:

• The Best Spanking Raunch
• Spanking Maggie Mayhem
• Plugged And Spanked
• Everything Butt: With Spanking!
• Your Basic Erotic Spanking
• Spanking Master Blackstar
• Mistress Matisse, A Ruler, And Your Knuckles

Mistress Matisse has some strong opinions about kinky words. Some I agree with, some I don’t:

And another thing: a “sub” is either an underwater boat or a sandwich. Using the word “sub” – as either a noun or a verb – to refer to either a person or activity in BDSM is extremely gauche. And I really feel that there is no punishment too strong for people who say or write “subbie” as a pseudo-cutesy way of saying “submissive”.

Hey, lady, BDSM is a pretty big tent. Over here in the spanking corner, “sub” makes a pretty good shorthand word for a person who is submissive. It’s not just a lazy shorthand, because has useful and distinctive connotations of informality (and possibly a lesser degree of submission) than the full “submissive.” Gauche? Maybe in Seattle, but I don’t go there much, so I can live with that.

As for “subbie”, it’s not “pseudo-cutesy” so much as it is actually cute (like many of the subbies it gets applied to) and usefully diminutive. I can see why a dominant woman might not get a warm fuzzy about a diminutive that’s most frequently applied to women, but on the other hand all the subbies I know are submissive and enjoy the affectionate connotations of the word.

Now to shift gears to the lesson that made me stand up and cheer:

One last word rant: Dom-i-nant is a noun. If you are a person who likes to be in control, you’re a d-o-m-i-n-a-n-t. When you are playing with your partner, you dom-i-nate them. That’s a verb. As you can see, they’re spelled differently, and that’s because they’re two different fucking words. If I see one more personal ad or profile saying “I’m a dominate Master..” I’m going to give someone an enema with a pureed Webster’s dictionary.

Preach it, sister! Only, why puree the thing? Just cube it into neat half-inch cubes. I’m sure if we put our heads together we could find one of those huge old antique brass clysters with a big enough cold brass nozzle to get the job done. And that way, the lesson will be more memorable to the miscreant.

I’ll give the Mistress the last word:

Language is a beautiful thing. Words are very important. So don’t fuck with them or the Mistress will kick your ass.

So it would appear that Mistress Matisse rang in 2019 with all the cheerful noises that a well-spanked bottom makes. She posted this very pretty New Year’s Eve spanking to Twitter:

So my New Year’s Eve is off to a great start! #lovemylife pic.twitter.com/voKBIlDJ4T

— Mistress Matisse (@mistressmatisse) January 1, 2019

Her 2019 must look pretty good if it’s off to that kind of start!

See Also:

• A New Year's Spanking For A Branked Wife
• Spanky New Year!
• Betrayed And Spanked In 1985
• Dominatrix Gone Wild
• New Years Eve Spanking Tradition

Mistress Matisse, quoting someone unspecified:

“I like my spanking like I like my barbeque – slow and low.”

See Also:

• Mistress Matisse Spanking Butt
• Paddles Are For Spanking
• Spanking Master Blackstar

Anybody who has spent any time at all on spanking forums and such has witnessed or participated in the train wreck of a discussion called “Does spanking need to be sexual?” or something similar. It’s a train wreck because the answer is different for different people. I myself consider spanking a form of foreplay, pretty much; other people don’t want any sex mixed with their spankings, or they do, but they are getting spanked by somebody with whom they have good reasons not to be sexual. Or whatever — there are ten different answers for every dozen people, and six of those people are convinced that what’s true for them ought to be true for everyone. Makes for a messy discussion, usually.

So against that backdrop, I thought it worthwhile to link you to Mistress Matisse’s slightly-more-general column that explains some of the reasons people may enjoy non-sexual BDSM. It’s called Spanks a Lot: BDSM Without Sex and it begins:

Someone said to me recently, “I kinda understand BDSM stuff when there’s sex involved. You tie a girl up, or she spanks you, or whatever, and then you fuck. That’s cool, if you like that. But I’ve seen people doing BDSM without sex, and I don’t get that. What’s the point?”

I’m not surprised he’s puzzled—even if you ask people who are in the BDSM community, opinions vary. My friend Greg put it to me thus: “Doing a scene without sex is like going to the movies, but leaving after the previews are over.” But other people see it differently. “Orgasm is not the only deeply fulfilling physical experience you can have with another human,” said Lorraine. And Steve’s reply was, “If you still have the energy to move, let alone fuck, after I play with you, I obviously didn’t play with you hard enough.”

I can go either way, so let me try to explain…

Given that I have myself not only blogged about finding kinky people in various ways, but I’ve even blogged about Mistress Matisse’s advice on finding kinky people, I found myself in sympathy with her mildly sarcastic (cough cough) remarks in response to a suggestion that she’d provided insufficient info on the matter, leaving it, her correspondent asserted, “completely unanswered”. I’m in sympathy, yes, even unto the tone:

Completely unanswered? Oh yes, my goodness me, how could I have overlooked that? I suppose it’s because in the five-plus years I’ve been blogging (not to mention nine years of Stranger columns), no one has ever asked me where to meet other kinky people. Ever. It’s a complete non-issue. Every other kinky person in the world is born knowing this, and if you don’t – well, I’m sorry, but I’m afraid you’re clearly not kinky.

All right, all right, that’s not very nice of me, is it? But my dear man, you must understand, I have given far more than hints on this subject. This is one of the two most-frequently-asked questions I get, and I have not merely touched on it – no, I have manhandled it. I have spanked it. I have shaken it by the scruff of the neck. I daresay I have thrown this question to the floor, kicked it around, ridden it until it was exhausted, and put it away wet.

I am far from the only sex blogger who has addressed this question, by the way. It was sloppy seconds long before I came (so to speak) on the scene. So for you to offer me a date with it, as if it were a virgin – well, that arouses my sarcastic side. Sorry, it’s an occupational hazard.

When in doubt, Google. Sheesh, you would think they were handing out internet licenses like free candy bars or something these days.

Anybody who has spent any time writing an adult blog has probably received a communication — usually an email or an irrelevant blog post comment — from somebody who writes at length about their own highly-specific fantasy and then fishes for some kind of detailed feedback. I get these all the time at Spanking Blog, deleting them left and right. I’ve long suspected there’s a fetish out there — perhaps related to exhibitionism — for describing one’s kink to a stranger, and/or engaging them in conversation about it, or somehow inducing them to write about it. “Hey, would you write me some wank material please?” (Only, they usually don’t even say “please”.)

For some reason the people who have this fetish (or, at least, the ones I hear from) seem to have issues with comprehending boundaries and appropriate contexts, which tends to make their missives seem creepy, weird, inappropriate, gross, or some combination of these. Understand, I’m not talking about the people who comment on a blog post to share the hot ideas it gave them or their own accounts of doing something similar; that’s just normal conversation in this context. Nope, I’m talking about people who dive deep into the goopy details of their own detailed fantasy, without anything to contexualize the conversation or explain why they foolishly imagine I might want to participate in it with them.

If you’re not following me, Mistress Matisse has just republished a classic example of the genre, plus her inimitably humorous response. And, yes, it’s an “I need a spanking” email in its broadest outlines…