The Different Kinds Of Spankings

Amber has written an interesting essay on the different kinds of spankings in her marriage — disciplinary, authoritative, reassurance, playful, and erotic. But what I liked best was her summation, because it’s a refreshing counterpart to all the blogs and journals and articles out there by people who have found the One True Spanking Answer For Everyone:

Now, there are all kinds of theories regarding the spankings themselves and when it should or should not be used and many people feel very strongly about their own particular theory.

Some people believe that spanking should never be done before sex because we moronic women might start “acting out” like Pavlov’s dogs in order to receive the sex that we really want but are apparently unable to ask for. Other people believe it’s wrong to ever use spanking erotically in any way whatsoever (so help you God). And even more people who believe disciplinary spankings are completely outrageous and spankings should ONLY be used erotically in an official BDSM “scene” and those of us who use spanking as actual discipline in a relationship have completely lost our minds.

Dan and I started out with our own very rigid ideas about spanking too, mostly because we didn’t know much about it and the unknown can be a scary thing. It’s funny to read some of the early entries and how determined we were on keeping erotic apart from discipline and how discipline spankings were only to be used as a last resort. As time has gone on and the discipline spankings have become less awkward, we’ve relaxed about all that.

When it happens, it happens. Does it really matter why if it works for whatever we’re using it for?

No indeed, it does not!

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