More Lame Spanking Email

I try, I do try, to be nice to the people who write to me. But sometimes I get an email so breathtakingly lame that I just have to share. The subject line was “hey” and the complete message reads:

hey pretty lady any lady want spank nude male ass you make horny feeling hot sex night?

Wow.

  1. Bethie commented on March 10th, 2005:

    :lol: Pretty lady? Now that’s funny!

    That reminds me though, can you make horny feeling hot sex night for me later? ;)

  2. SpankBoss commented on March 10th, 2005:

    I’m sure something can be arranged, pretty lady….

  3. Joanna commented on March 10th, 2005:

    It seems very very obvious that the person who wrote this is not a native English speaker. Fair enough…it still conveys a message that is cheesy and unerotic but as English speakers, how many of us could write a sexy, flirtatious poetic email in another language?? My guess is that this person is from the Far East, anyone fancy trying to be erotic in Japanese? Mandarin?? :-) Thought not, hehehe ;-)

  4. sandy commented on March 10th, 2005:

    Ha ha ha! You two are so cute!

  5. Jimbo commented on March 10th, 2005:

    OH. MY. GOD. That is unbelievable. It really is. And in a strange kind of way, it IS poetry, albeit entirely unintentional – a strangely lyric ballad to the death of grammar and the mournful ghost of punctuation…
    …er, or perhaps not.
    Still, very funny!

  6. TheBoss commented on March 10th, 2005:

    This is almost poetry, SpankBoss. =)

  7. A'marie commented on March 10th, 2005:

    I got something very, very similar, oddly enough. I’m desensitized to spam mail now. :D

  8. misschief commented on March 10th, 2005:

    you laughter making over person who are not speak English.
    from my country, this has name of “cheap joke.”

  9. SpankBoss commented on March 10th, 2005:

    I am laughter making over person who are think it might work to call man “pretty lady” and ask him for spanking by email.

    Seriously, I’m not laughing at bad English. I’m laughing at the thought process (in whatever language) that thinks sending this sort of one-sentence emails is a good idea.

    This is not a cheap joke. This is earned mockery.

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Reform School Collective Punishment Movie:

Detention House 3: Delinquent Girls Spanked Amazingly Hard

before and after brutal caning photo
"...the girls are prepared in the reformatory’s punishment room, naked, lying on their backs on special benches, bound with their legs spread above their heads, shamefully showing the two holes usually hidden..."