The Thrifty Scotsman Buys A Spanking

If you’re familiar with the ancient genre of jokes about the legendary thrift of the Scottish people, you’ll see the punchline of this story coming a mile a way. Still funny, though:

The man married the curviest girl in the office, and all his mates envied him. In particular, an unmarried young Scot, who said one day: “You ken, I’d give you a hundred pounds to smack the pretty bottom of you wee wife o’yours.”

Smith was furious, and went home raging to his wife about it. But the wife had Scots blood too, and she said: “You know, the furniture isn’t paid for, and I could do with a fur coat, what’s a few smacks on the bottom?”

Finally, she wore her husband down, and he was forced to tell Jock that is was on for him to smack the wife’s bare bottom for one hundred pounds, but only on terms. The husband was to be there, and no funny business.

So the three were in a suburban bedroom, the blushing wife removed her panties and bent over… Jock threw her skirt up and gently stroked her, saying “What beautiful curved, what pinkness, what dimples, what firmness…” and all the time rubbing and stroking, while the husband was nearly in hysterics. When Jock suddenly produced a flash camera and took a photo, the husband yelled, “Get on, get on and smack it or else the deal’s off!”

“Ooh no” said Jock, “I could not bring myself to smack such a beautiful bottom as this one, and besides, it would cost me a hundred pounds if I did!”

From the Chross forums.

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