Richard, your post about first time spanko experiences touched me profoundly. Something reverberated deep within my inner core when you mentioned the feeling of frustration, and even the doubt of one’s relative sanity because spanko tendencies almost seem aberrant behavior (from one POV).

Adolescence and young adulthood were uneasy times for me, questioning the nature of my sexuality. That is, until I discovered a publishing marvel at the local prairie adult bookstore. Janus magazine released a Spanking Special issue that became a “must have” addition to my private library. Needless to say I was very relieved to see my innermost fantasies offered for public consumption. “I’m not so perverted after all!”, I thought with vindication. “Apparently I’m a demographic!”

That exposure to the “English vice” anchored if not cemented my interest in spanko lifestyle. I have nothing but admiration for the British tradition of corporal punishment. And Richard, I envy you for your hobnobbing with all those gorgeous spanking models! In my mind you Limeys have spanking down to a science; there’s a style and ritual to it. I’ll never forget my first schoolgirl…We Yanks aim to build tradition, too.

Solidarity, man

The other part of the spanking process I like a lot is when he pulls my panties down or all the way off. My bf will take my panties off for a few reasons, two of which are for more spanking or right before he penetrates me. The rush I get when I feel his hands grabbing my panties and then feeling them as they move down my legs is like no other. I know he means business and it’s time for me to be a good girl and take my punishment or provide him whatever form of pleasure he wants from me.

If anyone is reading this, especially those who like males spanking females, please tell me what are the various aspects of m/f spankings that the men enjoy. I would like to try to find ways to make spanking me more enjoyable for my bf.

I think some of the conflict arises because “sex” is almost always interpreted to mean the physical act of copulation. It may be helpful to regard both copulation and spanking as a combination of submission and domination. And it’s probably wise to regard submission as the most important element. Insisting that you “have cane, will use” may bring your corporal career to an abrupt halt – in jail.

Is there any evidence to support this idea? A woman who goes by the name of “Leilani” once ran a small Yahoogroup called “The Spanking Planet”. It was an outlet for corporal fiction. But one of the most significant things to appear on it was a truth – “For me [Leilani] the act of submission is the erotic key.”

Key to what? For some it may be the pleasurable sensation of an increased heartbeat rate. For some it may be the onset of some form of hypnotic trance, possibly induced by humans ability to empathise. For some – probably most – it may be the more “classical” symptoms of sexual arousal. Just what door that key will unlock can be quite unpredictable.

In my own “career” this key has been quite important. I make and supply rattan canes. On several occasions, as an “after-sales” service, I’ve been asked to “deal with” a couple. Now this can be a very tricky assignment. Get it wrong and I’d have the male accusing me of “going for” his female partner while ignoring his needs. They wouldn’t be returning to me to buy more canes. Then realisation dawned. The scenes I was doing had really nothing to do with botty-whacking. Well, they did, but the whacking was a mere technicality. Yes, it had to be done proficiently, but it was still just a technicality, an act of work – a four-letter word, to be avoided where undesirable.

It is having a man or a woman stand in front of me and, devoid of any giggly facetiousness, say they did wrong and are ready to be punished that sends me into orbit. Their gender is totally irrelevant. Their words have taken me back aeons in time, to the very dawning of evolution, when living was nothing but submission and domination.

When it comes time for my departure there often are two bangs. The second bang is the door closing after me. Some people just aren’t content with the first lock they stick their key into :-)

Eric Carwardine, in Perth, Western Australia